In conversation with...Oneself!!

The drinking session last night was a much needed break for Noel and Arjun. Their work lives were pretty hectic and the news couldn't have gone without celebration.

Arjun slept the night on Noel's couch. He woke up with a start when his BlackBerry alarm rang. How he dreaded going to work today worse still was to go home change and then move to work.

He picked up his car keys placed on the coffee table right next to an empty wine glass. A thought flashed through his head.

Ananya!
Damn you Ira! Why did you start that name?

He shook his head, rubbed the back of his neck that was sore thanks to the uncomfortable sleeping position and left the place. He didn't wish to wake Noel and Ira from their slumber.

He moved towards the parking lot trying to find his car. He was so ecstatic yesterday that he didn't even care to note where he parked his car. The building watchmen directed him towards his car. He got into his car and drove out of the gates on the wide Bengaluru roads.

He loved Bengaluru for its weather and its roads. He checked the time on his stereo clock 5:15 A.M. He switched on his music system.

Maybe music will help me to switch off my thoughts.

The system jumped to action and played the song that made Arjun smirk.

Damn you stereo! Ananya's favourite track. You won't help me.

He was lost in the music blaring in his car. He felt as if it is transporting him through time. His thoughts rewind back to that monstrous day four years back.

The day I kissed Sunaina. I know I had kissed her back it had felt so good having your love back in your arms. But I loved Ananya then. I remember stopping Sunaina. Saying its just a rebound for her. But I know I stopped myself cause I knew I was hurting Ananya, myself and us. I went banging on her door but she refused to open it. I wanted to right the wrong. It was quite unlike her to sleep without saying a good night

What if she saw you making out with Sunaina?
Smirked his subconscious mind

I wasn't making out! It was just a kiss. She could have come and confronted me. She didn't have to take off! Like that!! It left me crushed not knowing what to do.

What the hell would she say to a guy and his ex-very-serious-girlfriend when they are kissing? What would she tell you? And she sure was right in taking off cause look today you are marrying the then ex-very-serious-girlfriend. She gauged it then what took four years for you to realise.
Scowled his subconscious

Look this turn of events with Sunaina is because of Ananya taking off. That night I was shattered. I didn't know where to go. If it hadn't been for Noel and Ira I would have been loitering on the streets piss drunk and eventually fallen into something. Sunaina and me were two broken souls who found comfort in each other. Yes we had a history which only made it easy. But I loved Ananya! I could have gone after her. I didn't want to be hurt. What if she wanted nothing and career was more important then me? If she didn't bother to think about us then why should I!

Oh so it is tit for tat now! She didn't think, so you didn't think. How convienent! You told Sunaina that Ananya and you were "just friends" why could you not tell her what you felt? Since it was so easy to talk to Sunaina you could have very well told that! She would have never kissed you, Ananya would have never seen it and never left you and you would be marrying her now. Case closed. I win. Thank you very much.

His subconscious now basked in the fame of winning the case with people around applauding and cheering for him.

His conscious moves ahead from the crowd ties the hands and legs of the subconscious and gags his mouth.

There! That should shut up you!

His subscious is furious now trying to mouth some words but can't.
He spits the gag out and shouts

WILL YOU LEAST CALL HER AND TELL HER AND INVITE HER TO THE WEDDING?

I don't have an answer for that.

Arjun sighed. He turned into the parking lot of his building, parked the car  in the allocated spot and switched the car ignition off. He sat there in silence.

The stereo clock blinked due to the change in minute. 5:35 A.M.

Since four years from that dreadful day Arjun had these arguments with himself as he didn't know where to find an answer. He knew one person had all the answers.

Ananya!

There I go again in conversation with myself.

His subconscious sat cross legged on his plush brown couch waiting for his next conversation.

Closure

Khushagra moved to Ananya's side who was clutching the phone in her hand. He placed his hand on her shoulder which made her cry more. He checked if someone was still there on the other side of the line but all he heard was dead silence. He pressed the red button and knelt to meet her eyes.

How can he marry? As in.. He can but what about me? Oh I took off then why would he care? I saw a dream and in reality I'm seeing a nightmare. I mean how can I accept. How can I be okay?

Ananya blabbered with frantic hand actions. She usually did that when she was angry or when she was depressed. And now she was both!

Khushagra didn't speak a word. He kept patting her shoulder and occasionally running his hand through her hair to console her.

What am I supposed to do? What am
I supposed to say? Should I call? Or not? But I should. Right? What further? That's it??

Maybe it is the final chapter. Maybe this it!
Khushagra finally spoke

How can it be?

You want it or not it is. Sooner you gulp the better it is. Right?

But...

What was he supposed to do? Couldn't wait for you to come back? Right? You saw them together. Why so shocked?

I still had an expectation. That he might come back. That he might call. He might meet. He might...

Say that he loves you.

Ananya burst into tears as she vigorously nodded her head to a yes. Khushagra held her in his arms.

Ananya, what do you want to do?

I don't know.

Do you want to call?

I don't know.

Do you want to call Noel?

I don't know.

Do you want to cry?

I don't know.

Do you want to go?

Khushagra felt a deep sigh on his shoulder. Ananya straightened herself and looked into his eyes as she wiped her tears.

I... I don't know how to go... I mean why put myself through all this after...

Closure?
Khushagra said it bluntly as he stared into her eyes.

I don't know. Or maybe. Might just.

You don't have to do this alone. I'll be there with you. Your plus one.
Khushagra held her hand as he spoke.

Closure, it is!
Ananya closed her eyes and burst out crying as she held his hands tightly.

One Thought

Ira's head was spinning when she heard what Arjun had to say. He had called in late at night and Noel and she had got really worried. But when he rang the bell and they saw him he was happy and excited about something. She could see the excitement and that twinkle in his eyes. At first she thought he finally got to speak to Ananya. But when those words came from his mouth she stood there still unable to react.

I proposed. To Sunaina. And guess what? She said a Yes!!

She could imagine each syllable slowly steadily sinking in. Noel sprang up and hugged his buddy. She looked at him disbelief first and then reminded herself that it is her childhood friend, Arjun who is getting married. She hugged him and hoped that he understood it all.

I knew you guys will be all excited! I am so happy. Finally after so many years! I am happy.
Arjun kept blabbering.

Ira went to the kitchen to get some drinks for them to celebrate. The walk from the hall to the kitchen was a few minutes but her mind had leaped four years. It flashed in front of her eyes with one thought in her mind...

Ananya!

When Ananya made that final call to Ira telling her about her decision to move to Bombay she was heart broken. That night everything changed. It was the night Ananya had packed her bags, Arjun landed at their apartment with a post-it in one hand and carnations in another. His eyes were red with anger and tears. Ira had opened the door. Noel and Arjun drank all night with Ira next to them who couldn't speak a word because of a promise she had given to Ananya.

Promise me, Ira you will not tell Arjun anything I told you. You do not know anything. You shall not confront him, talk to him or ask him anything. If he is happy I don't want anyone to change his mind. Please. Please do take care of him.
She nodded to Ananya's parting words.

That night Arjun spoke all night about how much he loved her. And how frustrated he is, that he had no idea what had happened so suddenly that she had to take off. He had questions that no one answered. He wanted to go to Bombay but Noel stopped him. Noel insisted that she had moved on in her career and that is what was important to her. Not Arjun, not this friendship not anything. Ira sat their dumb not knowing what to say and how to say. She let the drunken men blabber. When they passed out on the couch, she went to her room and had cried her heart out. She hated this change.


For these four years, she knew where Ananya was. Where she lived. What she did. They were in touch. In these four years, they didn't speak every day but caught up with each other at least once a month or two by a long phone call. First time in her life she hid something from Noel.

Of course Noel was on Arjun's side, he didn't know both sides of the story. She did and she always thought she could be the cupid. But she knew Ananya was healing from something that was unforgivable and Arjun was moving towards something that he always wanted.

Maybe he was never over Sunaina. He was his first love after all.
Thought Ira.

She kept her promise. She never spoke about Arjun to Ananya and about Ananya to Arjun. It was a forbidden topic. They tried hard to find new topics and when their throats choked, they called it a day and said a bye.

For four years she knew Arjun was getting close to Sunaina and was happy that he found comfort in her. But sadly she never could be completely happy for him because one thought always lingered in her mind - Ananya!

She absentmindedly picked up four glasses and a bottle of their favourite Chardonnay with a plate of cheese. She placed all of it on the table and called the guys. Noel looked into her eyes puzzled as if trying to read her mind.

We are just the three of us here. Fourth glass? For whom, madam?
Noel winked at her.

Ananya!
How she wished she could answer.

Just picked up all the glasses I had kept on the counter. Wish An... sorry Sunaina could be here.
Ira explained.

He heard just two letters and Arjun's eyes met hers. He tried to not complete the name in his head but he couldn't stop. He shook his head and came back to the present. Filled the three glasses with one glass standing empty there. Ira stared at the empty glass for long before she picked her glass.

Here's to Arjun and Sunaina! Cheers!
Noel raised his glass followed by Arjun and Ira.

The next morning Ira called in sick after Noel left. She picked up the empty glass that was kept on the table and filled it with wine. She drank the complete bottle waiting for the alcohol to do the trick. And yes, it did!

She checked her watch. 2:10 P.M.

She will be in her room now for lunch.

She picked up her phone and called Ananya.

Hi, Ira! Ssup? How come you called during the day? Everything okay?
She heard the chirpy voice on the other side.

Ann...anya!
Ira slurred

Hey! Are you drunk? Hahaha afternoon sessions. Where are you? Is Noel around?
Ananya was a little worried but she knew Ira wouldn't do anything stupid.

Annan..ya! Just shuddup and listen okay. I am breakinnn d promise! I wanna talk abou' Arrj...un!
She continued to try and make coherent sentences.

Ananya sat up in her chair a little worried about Ira.
What is it, Ira?

Arrrj...un is gettin marrried!

The Present

Ananya! Ananya!! ANANYA! Wake up.

Hmmm... Arjun... I missed you... Idiot... Monkey... But... long...
Ananya continued to blabber in her sleep.

ANANYA! Wake up!! We’ll get late to the office.

She opened her eyes to the new dawn only to find Khushagra running all over the place.

We will be late we need to leave. Quick! Freshen up... Chief is waiting for us. We have this meeting... Remember! WAKE UP.

Khushagra kept talking as he packed the files, papers and stationary scattered in the hall. They remained there all night. Working on a pitch presentation wasn’t an easy task. They were sipping their favourite wine with a platter of cheese arguing, laughing, agreeing and preparing the most awaited presentation of their lives.

Ananya had dozed off on his shoulder while he was giving her the reasons to highlight the car features versus car brand name. He didn’t budge an inch since then. He let her sleep while he continued preparing the presentation on his MAC. When he was satisfied with the content he rested his head on hers and went off to sleep. Occasionally he stirred to her random blabbering in sleep. The same continued throughout the night. When he first heard Arjun’s name he pretty much understood what the dream was all about.

He loved her. And he didn’t feel the need to even hide it. His proposal was however brutally shot down. Ananya had finally found a confidant after 4 years. She finally trusted someone. But unfortunately she wasn’t in the same place – emotionally. Before he proposed he promised that nothing will change between them. He shall always be standing by her rock solid. And that’s what he did when she said a no.

You won't believe the dream I saw.
Ananya continued while trying to open her eyes.

Lemme guess. Arjun came back to Mumbai to meet you and you understood why did it all happen and he had an explanation of his own and you had yours. And you kept your point and ensured you were heard this time. And then you guys forgave each other and fell in love all over again. Right?
Khushagra finally stopped cleaning answer her.

Were you in my dream?
Ananya retorted and burst out laughing.

Ya kinda sorta. You kept blabbering the whole night. Joined the puzzle and voila! The story tentatively titled "Reconciled".
Khushagra dramatically made double quotes in air as he spoke. Ananya smirked with her usual 'whatever' look.

If madam has been entertained enough can we please get ready for the meeting before chief fires us.

Ananya nodded in agreement and made her move to the bathroom. Little did she know that Khushagra had already seen her eyes filled to the brim with tears between her giggles and smiles.

Here we go again. 4 years and 36th day. And she claims she's a very good actress. Hah!
Khushagra murmured under his breath.

Turn by turn they got ready and rushed to the office. The presentation went off well and chief was once again proud of his two stars. He mockingly always said

A deck of cards has just one ace of spades but mine has two.

K. Subramanian fondly called as Chief was the owner of the only Indian advertising agency in the country. Many came in to merge with his company but each was offered a cup of coffee and home baked cookies and then shown the door. This treatment was called the coffee-n-cookie, well known within the company and in the industry.

Conexion was a full service agency operated from 5 cities. Chief was known to have a hawk's eye. He knew things even when he wasn't around and could smell fresh talent from miles. He was particularly fond of Khushagra and Ananya - the aces of spades in his deck of cards. Their performance and passion reminded of him of his younger days. Neither had any interest of switching jobs, which was a rarity in this industry. He knew that. Often they came and told him how they gave the headhunters the coffee-n-cookie treatment. At age 59 and 60 right around the corner, the need to retire was lurking in his mind. He knew its going to be a grand celebration, a frill he didn't care too much about but he compiled to societal pressure.

Work was always called his extra marital affair. But post his wife's death he married work. Chief had no natural heir to his company, a regret with which his wife passed away. He never felt the need. Until now.

Amongst all these dimwits my two shining stars feel the same for the agency as I feel.

Chief thought as the presentation was to end. And that was the most important trait to him. He knew Ananya was emotionally not stable with all the Arjun baggage.

Khushagra?
His eyes silently fell on him.

Khushagra noticed the stare while nodding to the client's feedback. He knew something was going on in chief's mind.

Is it too much responsibility at a very young age?
Chief remained lost in his thoughts.

The meeting concluded and chief invited the guests for a cup of coffee in his room. Ananya and Khushagra were the only ones left behind to pick up papers and start work on the next project in hand.

Something is going on in chief's mind.
Khushagra finally spoke after everyone left.

Yup! It seemed like he wasn't here. Lost in some thoughts.

Wonder what?

He'll tell us if it's important. I'll catch you in sometime. Lunch, my office!

Ya. Will meet you in your room.
Khushagra checked his watch.

11.05. Need to check if the creatives have dispatched.
Khushagra made a mental note.

Once he settled in his office he went through his email, files on his table, doing his regular office chores. On his desk was a picture in an ebony frame. It was a picture of Khushagra & Ananya from an office party sometime last year. Ananya was tipsy when Khushagra was helping her and the office photographer swooped in to capture the moment. Khushagra had his usual charming smile and Ananya was controlling the roar of laughter that continued after the picture was clicked.

This picture always put a smile on his face.

I haven't seen that bastard Arjun but I ever get my hands on him I swear to lord I'll wring his neck.
Khushagra thought as he held the frame in his hand.

I love her. But it isn't necessary for her to love me back. She loves Arjun. Period. What if...
His thoughts trailed as he looked at his desk clock. 2:03 P.M. it read.

What if I get in touch with Arjun and get him to talk to Ananya. I love her so much that I think I can do this. To put this smile on her face, Anything!

Khushagra kept the frame back to where it was.

Time for lunch.
His stomach howled. He made his way to Ananya's cabin. The usual knock and he entered to find Ananya clutching her phone in her hand and staring at it with teary eyes and disbelief.

Problem?
Confused Khushagra asked.

Ananya slowly raised her eyes to meet Khushagra's.

Ira called. Never thought I would ever hear this.

Ananya burst out crying as Khushagra held her in his arms.

What happened?

Arjun...
Her voice got lost in sobs.

Reconciled

Just like a Bollywood movie, sepia toned flashback, Ananya imagined. She was packing when Arjun walked in with Sunaina after their visit from the lawyer. Arjun was blank for a moment not understanding what's happening.

Hey! Where you off to?

Oh, hi! I'm going to Mumbai! Chief has a great challenging project for me there. And he has specially recommended me for it. So ya!
Ananya was trying to sound excited to hide the turmoil within her.

Wow! Congrats. How did the coffee date go?
Arjun enquired with absolute no emotion in his voice.

Hmmm... It was great! Felt nice actually. I'm happy am going to Mumbai... Will be able to spend more time with him too.
Ananya was a pathetic liar. She was busy packing her eyes fixed on the clothes on her bed and the suitcase. One eye contact and Arjun would know meeting Neerav was nothing but a farace.

Nice.
Arjun replied disheartened.

Sunaina realized she was an unwanted in the room. She had quietly slipped away during their conversation.

So, when you coming back?
He asked casually.

Ananya's throat choked, the lump didn't let her speak, tears welled up, she looked up to meet Arjun's confused eyes
Never! I'm settling there. Back in Mumbai. I'm thinking about Neerav and me. I think we gave up too soon...
She rambled, muttered and sobbed.

Arjun was dumbstruck. He felt as tough the whole ceiling came crashing down. A sudden rage of anger rose within him. He clenched his fists to control every bit of it.

When were you supposed it tell me?

I got to know yesterday... Chief called... So...

Ya right! Phone call, message, ping, mail... You didn't have a second, right?

I'm sorry, Arjun. But I didn't know how to...

Ya ya its okay! Good luck.
And he stormed out of the room. Ananya hadn't slept the whole night. He hadn't even asked when was she leaving nor did he stop her.

Today when he stood in front of her, she had no words. The jigsaw puzzle fit well and she felt like a dimwit.
If only I had spoken...


Ananya, you didn't even call when you left. I had come home with 20 long stemmed red and yellow carnations when I found the damn post-it on the fridge. Do you even realize what I felt that time? What made you a stone overnight? What made you just... go?

I... didn't... mean...
Ananya had absolutely no words coming to her mind.

Arjun went on.
One small assumption... And look at all this today!

It was painful, Arjun. Calling you and saying a bye was the second most difficult thing I would have to do after leaving you!
Ananya was almost screaming.
I couldn't have possibly said a 'bye'. One more look at your face and I would have changed my mind. I wanted you to be happy. That's all! I would never want to hurt you...

But look at it now! Aren't we hurt aren't we feeling lost aren't we closed? Cause of one stupid assumption...
Arjun continued to ramble.

Then why didn't you stop me? Why didn't you call!!! Why Arjun?

Cause I was fucking mad at you. What choice did you leave me with? No contact number nothing. You didn't even wait to say a bye no call nothing. One damn pink coloured post-it. What a fool I was, holding carnations to wish good luck to the girl I...
Arjun stopped midway not sure if he wanted to continue. He looked up to meet Ananya's eyes that were lost and hopeful.

Forget it! Doesn't matter!
Arjun regained his composure.

I'm sorry.
He meant every syllable of it. He knew what she did was wrong but she wasn't entirely wrong in assuming after what she saw.

Ananya stood there seeing his shoulders droop in defeat and the entire two hour conversation ran in her head. From yelling to this silence, every word rang through her mind. She still held her stand. I'm not wrong!

But suddenly it struck to her it wasn't the matter of right or wrong and that's exactly why Arjun said a sorry. Cause it just doesn't matter. Today, all of it is futile. He's back, standing in front of her.

Ananya walked up to him and gave him a tight hug with tears in her eyes.

I've missed you, you jackass! What took you so long? Idiot!
Ananya rambled more such abuses as she broke down and cried her heart out.

Arjun hugged her back holding her tightly, lightly kissing her head, tears welling up his eyes that he was trying to fight back.
I've missed you too sweetheart. Like crazy, nah even that can't describe it.

He held her close to his heart as she vented out, crying. He once again felt that warmth that he had missed for so many years. She still felt the same. Nothing had changed.

I swear on you god I'm never leaving this girl! Ever!! Thank you... Just for this moment... Thank you! Maybe not the right time to express what I want to say. Later!
Arjun said a silent prayer.

Little did he know not expressing his feelings for the third time was a mistake he would regret... Soon.

The Silence

No, Sunaina... No!
Arjun pushed her away

I am sorry! I am...
Sunaina straightened herself.

No, don't be sorry. Sunaina, I understand but trust me I'm not in the same place. Getting over you was the most difficult thing I've ever done! I'm sorry Sunaina I can't do this. I'm sorry!
Arjun said it with composure & he held her by her shoulder.

I'm sorry
Sunaina tried to control every emotion in her. She stood there biting her lip, eyes closed.

Sunaina, this won't help. I know you missing the closeness & loved but sweetheart, this rebound won't help you. Heal yourself first and then get into something. With so many hang-ups & complications, it won't help. Are you with me?

Ya! I'm sorry, Arjun. I just got.. didn't know what I was doing.. I'm sorry

Shh! It's okay. Don't keep saying sorry. Its okay... Chill! It happened it happened! Forget it okay? Chalo time to sleep. You lie down here I've some work will sort & come.. Okay?
She nodded.

Whew! Close call. It's best to leave her alone now. As he walked out he again tried opening Ananya's door. It was locked.

Damn!
He mumbled under his breath.

Ananya had dozed off to sleep sobbing. Arjun slept on the couch. He thought it was for the best. He had to leave early for work. His phone alarm rang at 5 A.M. He woke up, freshened up and entered his room to get a fresh pair of clothes. Sunaina was fast asleep in his room. He tiptoed out. He knocked softly on Ananya's door.

She stirred, her head was throbbing with all the crying. Hearing Arjun's voice she wanted to open the door and run into his arms. But the pain within her reminded about the night before. She didn't open the door. She heard him leave. Tears welled up, she threw her head back into the pillow.

She woke up at 9 A.M. got ready almost mechanically and left for work. She didn't even notice where Sunaina was, she couldn't care less. She felt so different within her. Holding a grudge was so not her. Not caring was not her. She was distracted the whole day. Unluckily, she didn't have anything much to do-more the idleness more the thoughts.

She was staring blankly at her work station, when the table phone came in her line of sight. She picked up the phone.

Think! her alterego yelled. THINK AGAIN!!! She dialled Chief's number. He received on the third ring.

Chief... I'm coming to Mumbai... For the project! Is the spot still open?

Ananya is everything okay?
He sensed the tension in her voice.

The concerned manner almost broke the dam. She fought her tears, controlled her voice and spoke again

Everything is perfect, Chief. I'll leave in a week's time.. Is that okay?

Yes. I'll mail your office about it. See you!

She hung up and sighed. Day passed by slowly. She received an unusual call when she was leaving from office. Why is he calling?she received the call.

Hello

Hye! Neerav here! How you doing?

Ya doing good. Ssup? Long time!

Ya! I know
An awkward silence followed.

Hmmm... I am in Bengaluru. Want to meet up? Coffee maybe?

Ananya had no idea why this happening all together. First Arjun then Sunaina and Neerav. It was like everyone's past needed to be reminded. Crap!

Hmmm... would love to. How long are you here? Today is a little tight ... working on a project got to wrap it up. And tomorrow...

It's not necessary to meet, Ananya! You can say a no.
He replied curtly.

Anyways, am here for a week let me know. You can contact on this number, hope to see ya!

He said a bye and hung up. Ananya wanted to say something more but this wasn't the time she was too confused at this moment to say anything. She was leaving, unusually early, and her colleagues made fun of her. Ananya always worked till late. But today she couldn't sit for another minute. It was after she left the building loneliness trapped her.

She didn't know where to go, what to do. She definitely didn't want to go home and spend time to Sunaina, of all the people. She needed to pour her heart out to someone. Noel isn't in town she suddenly realised. Ira!!! her thoughts spoke. She dialled Ira's number, silently praying she should be free Please, God! Please!!!

Ira received the phone after 15 seconds and mumbled,
Hello!

Thank God, Ira... You sleeping! I'm so so sorry, ya!. I want to meet, NOW! Will come over? Is that okay?
Ananya's voice was trembling and cracking towards the end. Ira was wide awake sensing the trouble in Ananya's voice. She didn't have the heart to say she was unwell.

Ya, sure! Come over!

Ananya had her 'venting out' session & told her next plan of action to Ira, who was sipping her bowl of hot soup.
Just say what you feel & then leave. He deserves to know ya, Ananya

No, Ira. I don't want to complicate things. I don't have the strength to hear anything now. Ira I can't.
Ananya spoke as she sobbed. Ira sighed and gave up.

Ira, I need a promise. You wont discuss this with either Noel or Arjun. Please! I know you haven't hidden anything from Noel. But for my sake, Please!

Fine! I promise. I don't know what good it will do. But fine will keep it to myself. When are you leaving?

Sunday morning.

Hmmm...
Ira was staring at the floor blankly.

Will miss you!
Ananya hugged her

Obviously!
Ira smirked hugging her back.

Will miss you too galpal! I will be stuck with these boys. Huh!

Hahahaha... Will stay in touch! Call, ping, mail!

Ya we'll see.
Ira winked.

Hey I will!

I know sweetie!
She smiled.

Need one more favour. Can I stay back here for the night?
Ananya hesitated.

Ofcourse! More time to spend. Don't know when will I get to gossip with you next?
Ira smiled putting her tongue out.

To: Arjun
Ira's a little unwell. Staying with her for the night. Tomorrow will go to work from here. In the evening meeting Neerav for coffee. Ya! Very excited. He sounded a little... Hmmm... ;). Will see ya tomorrow night. Good night. Love you! :)


She backspaced 'Love you' and hit the send button. A new plan was sprouting in her head. She tried to keep the message as casual as possible.
Nothing close to the calmness in the message is what she felt within her!!!

And it unfolds...

The stare crept through her. It was like some potion that would make her say the truth. It was just him. She never hid a thing from him except this. She found difficult to find words. How should she start? The dormant volcano finally found its way out.

What is he pissed at? He did it to me!! But why is he here then? She fought with her thoughts. Today something wasn't making sense.

Why did you leave, Ananya? Why?

I... I thought... Thought you were... rather wanted to be with Sunaina... And I...
Ananya stammered with whatever words came to her mind.

He still has the same power-to make me feel miserable even when he is wrong and I'm right!!! He did it and now making me feel guilty! How does he do it so well?
Anger rose within her failing to channelise though. Tears welled up her eyes that's how it always happened.

You thought!!! You thought... No! Damn it you assumed! You fucking assumed!!! And for that stupid assumption of yours this is what you thought? Tell me Ananya is this what you thought.. That you should walk out. Do you even know what...

He threw his hands in the air with a sense of futility. His volume was three pitches higher to his normal soft speech. He had reached a boiling point and his fist tighten in an attempt to control his rising anger.

But you kissed her!!! U think I didn't see that? U think I am a fool eh? U think doing all this made me feel good. Staying away from you, not trusting anyone and living all alone - You think all this had been easy? Tell me something, Arjun, if u would have seen me kiss someone would you not think the way I thought? Or do you have the tendency to just go around kissing people. Worst still it was Sunaina damn it! Not even someone random. She tells me you had a talk with her and we were "just friends"...

She was yelling, rolling her eyes & occasionally wiping her tears.

Arjun cooled down, almost immediately when he heard about the kiss. He slapped his head
What had I done? Fuck! What the fuck had I done? Why did I have tell Sunaina we are friends why did I have to kiss... Holy crap! This is why? All this while I thought it was her... But it was ME!

The guilt kept rising. Almost like a lightening it struck Arjun about that night

But... But I had moved away from her... Didn't Ananya see that! I told her that I couldn't do it. This isn't right and I had given some more gyan... Had she not heard that? his conscious regained to what Ananya was speaking

I wanted you to be happy, Arjun but not at the cost of making myself feel miserable. I wouldn't be strong enough to see you guys go around. I hope you guys are doing well and happy with each other. I sensed no emotion when I asked about her few minutes back. Is everything okay between you two?

Ananya's composure was back. She said it with compassion and the same love she had for Arjun.

She is... Ya she is fine! But why didn't you come and talk to me? You could have done that, right? Why did you've to assume?

Arjun was blabbering staring at the floor. He never thought listening to this was going to be this difficult.

Come and ask you what, Arjun? That do you love her or did you kiss her just like that... Or just like... Forget that! (she didn't want to bring that up) You wanted me to come and ask you this and hear you say my love is back... Is that what you wanted me to hear? And how do you think I would have dealt with that??? You kissed me you held me close to your heart and I always wanted to believe it was because you felt something and then suddenly your old love is back... Look today Arjun, you with her happy! That's all matters to me! Chuck all what's happened...

Sunaina is in London, Ananya. (He cut her short) She went to her uncle's place just few days after you left... She thought new place would just do her good. Sunaina isn't with me.
Ananya felt a bullet go through her.

If you would have stood there for maybe 5 more seconds just 5 more... you would have known!
Saying this, his eyes, reddened by anger and tears, met hers!